Jesus Christ and the german shepherds!

As you know, if you read CAN U C ME, I lost my Mother this summer, and although Mom and I had a checkered past, we had become closer, and I knew more about who she was. So when the Funeral was set and we were off to the Church I knew that this is where she would have pictured herself being 9 from an earthly perspective, as she had spent many years at Holy Rosary. I no longer attended mass with my parents when I visited, if I was well enough I attended a Methodist Church, and although at first I know my family was disturbed by that, but appeared to accept it as time went on. Anyway, after Mom had been taken, and we watched the Hearst carry her away, I suddenly felt a longing to be alone in the beautiful Church, away for the business of the reception. Catholic Churches still hold a reverence for me, and one of the most beautiful parts are the splendid stained glass windows. I took my time, going from window to window, and talking to God and Mother while I went. I finally came to the window that depicts the wonders of the birth of Christ Jesus. Mary and Joseph were there, the manger, and Jesus in swaddling clothes and the....my mind thought it was deceiving itself at first, (some deeper Fibro Fog that was distorting the images I saw), but try as I might I couldn't remove the 2 German Shepherds lying in the front left corner...I called in my family, just to ensure I wasn't having some psychotic break...and they too saw the German Shepherds...upfront...in the Manger Scene!!!!!
Apparently the priest who ran the Church during it's window making days, liked German Shepherds! Well I like German Shepherds too, but I heartily doubt I would even think that I had the right to insert my own personal passion into a piece of art commissioned for the beautification of the communities Church!!! Apparently there are "German shepherd" images inserted in other areas...what if the next priest has a passion for tarantulas!!!!
Now what would Martin Luther have said about that!

Nate & Matthew take on....The Pond Monsters

The first summer after we moved into this house I decided I must build a pond. Ponds weren't trendy then, and I was too poor to get a fancy kit from a garden supply house, so I went down to our local pool installer and asked him if I could rummage through the cast off pool liners...he said "sure" because he had no use for them ( several years later you had to put your name on a list and pay a small dividend!) So off I went and hauled back a bright blue pool liner, and a black tarp (pool cover) to hide the blue. My yard was bare so I picked a spot in the middle towards the fence that led to the forest.

I dug for what seemed like an eternity and my son Andrew dug until he said it was 24" deep and we ended up with a small pond about 6 feet round, and 18" deep! I loved it, and every frog for miles loved it...the birds loved it...and anytime we had visitors we all went out to sit around "the pond"! Over the years the renovations of the pond took us to a new level where our goldfish over wintered and we were blessed with baby gold fish, Since I've been ill the pond and garden have suffered severe neglect, and I have been unable to enjoy it, or our summer firepit for at least 5 years. There was so much muck in the bottom that you couldn't run a pump, and I couldn't put fish in. My waterlilies (that had grown happily in No Frills baskets for 18 years) finally died too. Just last weekend, Matt and his friend Nate decided to take on the task of cleaning out the pond, and you have never seen 2 dirtier boys in the process!!! But if they weren't scary enough to look at you must see these monster frogs that are now swimming happily at a nearby abandoned quarry!!! Take into account the size of the boys hands holding the frogs....they're much bigger than mine.....

Any way...I am so excited that we will be able to have fish again, and sit by the fire roasting giant marshmallows as the bullfrogs serenade us! Also the fish will rid us of the mosquito larvae so my son Paul will able to sit aoutside with out fear of WestNile virus!!!(city boy!)

The Prettiest Girl in the World turned 6

On September 6th, this little beauty turned six years old. It hardly seems possible, and yet there she is, hugging our little "Ollie" (who doesn't look extremely happy, but is cooperating, which says allot for a Chi!
Gracie shares her birthday with another favorite person of mine, my Grandmother...Grace would have loved her too, and Granny would have fussed over Grace as if she were the only little girl in the world!
I am a lousy Grandmother....I live too far away to be of any use, and being ill further complicates my capacity to be the silly, fun loving, crazy granny that I want to be. I know that you'll think I'm just bragging, but Gracie truly IS the most brilliant 6 year old ever! And it doesn't even need to be said...but I'll say it anyway....she is, and has always been (since the moment of birth...which you can't often truly say) the most beautiful girl ever!! I am a poor substitute for her Uncle "Map" (she can of course now say Matt but I cling to the days when I would say "Hello Gracie...it's Granny G..." to which she would respond..."where's Uncle Map?"...and there our conversation would end!! I think that if I had the undying force of thwe Energy Bunny I might rate higher in her book, but who can blame her!! There was a time when Matt needed an afternoon nap, but that had long since expired until he spent the day with Grace....and then they both needed one!! It's funny when you think about how when we're young, we can't wait to grow up, and do all the things that the adults do...and yet when we grow old, we spend most of our time thinking about when we, and everyone else was young!

Happy Birthday to you

Happy Birthday to you

Happy Birthday sweet Gracie

Happy Birthday to you!

XXXXXX000000

Night Musings

The other night, when I couldn't sleep, which seems crazy after all the drugs I've consumed in order to achieve it, I gave up and was beckoned outside by this glorious moon. The clouds were moving, but only infinitesimally, so that you had to look away for a second and then look back to really see they had changed. The garden was bright, and the bullfrogs croaked in unison! There was scuffling going on in the woods behind us...nocturnal business of some kind. I was reminded of a night when I sat quietly beside the pond, and in the lights on the bushes a small silhouette seemingly fell out of the sky, and onto the gravel path before me. It was about the size of my hand, and busy with something so important that it didn't seem to notice my presence. As my eyes adjusted to the light I realized that it was a very small owl (sawheet I think) eating an even smaller mouse! I was entranced as I shared this moment. I tried to hold my breath for fear of giving away my presence, and then after it was done it turned it's head, in that Linda Blair fashion, looked at me straight in the eyes, and then flew up into the Pines! It was as if he had known I was there all the time, but had given me permission to witness his evening meal, and I felt an extreme sense of privilege that he had! I suppose if there's a moral to this story it must be that sometimes sleep is overrated and maybe something more magical awaits us if we choose to take the opportunity.

The Funeral

It's seems like a long time ago, and then again, it seems like last week, that we held the wake and funeral mass for my Mother, this past July 13Th. I think that funerals today should stand by a new and improved ritual that recognizes the need to come to terms with what has happened, rather than to be caught in the stress and rush of losing a loved one and at the same time organizing their last most important act on earth all in a matter of a couple of days. It's not as if we are bound by Muslim or Jewish traditions? (I don't think anyway!) and it's not as if we don't have the ability to hold on to our loved one for a few days more??? I don't get it.

Anyway, I would have liked to have put together a video memorial to Mom, showing all the wonderful pictures of her through the years (Dad took allot of pictures of her....I wonder why!!!) but between finding out that Mom had passed and absorbing that information, then packing; then traveling; then shopping (no formal fat clothes on hand) it all swirled around us and I was waiting for the little people to appear.. The wonderful staff at the Funeral Home kept asking us if we would like to do "this or that" and we frequently said no simply because we didn't really know what they were asking of us, so finally after saying "no" to placing the "Pall" over Mom's casket, I decided to ask what a pall was and it was to simply place the cloth over Mom's casket symbolizing her faith (which she had) and then I said "I'd like to do that" and Angela did too...so we did it together, and it was a very moving moment for me. We both "tucked her in" and I kissed her casket, just as I had kissed her at the wake, and they laid a crucifix at her head. It was a grey and sombre day, appropriate to the occasion. I walked with Dad, not out of any protocol ' just as it happened... My sister, Angela, walked with my middle son, Andrew, and held his hand, (That being the 1st miracle to occur during the Mass!!) ...as he sobbed throughout the service. Way in the back were Paul, Jacquie and Matt. Don't know how they ended up there...like I said we hadn't really talked about that. The Priest knew my Mother well, and I think he could have been more personal than he was but that's all I'll say about him...The choir sang, and we choked out the words as well as we could between sobs and just as the service was coming to a close, Father Frank lit the incense jar and began to swing gently over the her casket...all at once the clouds broke and streams of sunlight flowed down over Mother, catching the incense in a swirling, glowing shaft of spectacular light ....and everyone gasped!!! I knew she could do it...she'd saved the best for last!! That was my Mother!!